Gentlemen, summer tactical chic is IN… if your tactical mission is “dominating brunch.” Taylor Stitch presents the Short Sleeve Surplus Shirt ($118), “inspired by vintage military surplus shirts from the 70s.” Translation: they raided grandpa’s attic, then made it… slightly less itchy. “100% organic cotton!” So sustainable, you can almost feel virtuous while spilling BBQ sauce on it. “Reverse sateen” – sounds fancy, mostly just means it’s fabric. But durable fabric! Capable of withstanding… intense Netflix binging on the sofa.

“No pleats for easy ironing.” Because even alpha males occasionally feign domesticity with an iron. “Two chest pockets!” For storing… existential dread and maybe your phone. “Wash cold, tumble dry low.” Laundry instructions simpler than your dating life. For the gent who wants rugged vibes without actual ruggedness, military inspiration without actual enlistment, and a “surplus” shirt that makes him look like a stylish civilian. Gift the Taylor Stitch Surplus Shirt. Mission accomplished: looking effortlessly… shirt-like.