Gentlemen, does your mantlepiece lack a certain… je ne sais quoi? Perhaps a touch of the absurd? Well, say hello to the LOWFOOL // ADVENTURER MK4 Figure ($448) – a whopping 50cm tall testament to your impeccable taste (and questionable sanity). This “heavily worn” PVC and ABS behemoth is the brainchild of FoolsParadise, and features a light-up inner helmet – perfect for illuminating the dark corners of your bachelor pad (or the existential dread in your soul). Each figure is hand-painted and unique, just like every questionable decision you’ve ever made. Limited edition, folks. So snag this stellar specimen of space exploration (or lack thereof) before it’s gone. After all, what’s more sophisticated than a giant, slightly-deranged astronaut cosmonaut chilling on your shelf? We can’t think of a thing. But hey, maybe that’s just us.

P.S. Batteries not included. Because apparently, even space idiots forget the essentials.