Gentlemen, ever feel the sudden urge to fell a rogue lamppost or traverse a particularly treacherous puddle in the urban jungle? The Danner Logger 917 GTX Boots ($230) are here to answer that call (or at least make you look like you could). Inspired by proper Pacific Northwest logging boots, these bad boys are built for “urban exploring,” which we assume involves navigating spilled lattes and rogue pigeons.

With a GORE-TEX liner, your feet will remain drier than a stand-up comedian’s notepad after a bomb. The Vibram sole will give you the traction of a mountain goat on a greasy pole. Plus, they come with two sets of laces, because decisions are hard. And for the truly discerning gent, there are even “optional kilties” – those little leather flaps that protect your laces from… well, enthusiastic debris. For a mere $230, you can stomp around town in these full-grain leather beauties, feeling like a rugged outdoorsman even if your biggest adventure is finding a decent flat white. Perfect for the gent who appreciates timeless style and the faint possibility of encountering some actual logs on his commute.